x-cessiveassassin

 Who Ever Made This.
YOU’RE A GENIUS 

I was told to write down my feelings and thoughts, but now that I think about it I dont want the world to hear my problems or worries. But of course you know im going to tell you anyways…

Have you ever thought about killing yourself or you feel like you dont belong here in this demonic world, where people judge you, hate you and hurt you. Well I have I think about it everyday, i will think about it til i die, no one can change my thoughts but me.

First thing I have to say is that bedbugs suck abs, no really they suck, they feed on your skins and leave you with three little red marks on your body. How do I know… because  I have them.. I know what your thinking “ewwww, i dont want to hang around her anymore” thats fine, I dont want to hang with me anymore either, but I cant do that. What the bad par is, is that they are in my dorm room and at my house… What the really bad thing is that its a very long process to get rid of them. This is why i never want to stay in one place to long or to go anywhere. and also its because of my mother’s dumb stupid (and other words i would like to insert here but cant) boyfriend, I wanted him dead since the first time i saw him. This brings me to my next subject…

Second thing. My mother’s boyfriend…. I HATE HIM!!! I am very angry as you can tell. I hate him so much, he is the one that brought them from some stupid girls house that he has been laying up in the bed with and then wanna accuse someone else of cheating when in reality its just hime doing the nasty… I want him gone but mama is like “i want him to stay and keep bringing in the stupid bed bugs, cheating on me, and oushing me around, stressing me out…” I dont want that and if i get a man like that.. i will make sure he is dead within the next 2 seconds of our relationship… and if you think he is all nice and crap. WRONG… its all lies and he is the king of liers. He is nice around our friends and family but once you get him home or into somewhere quiet and no one is around, all hell done broke lose…. Now if i get mad like that its “call the cops there a crazy lady”, noooo but if he get mad like that it “ohh, all he need to do is take him meds”…. forget you and your life, i cant take this crap anymore….

Third thing. I have no money for anything, i dont have money on my card for school anymore, so im stuck with eatting noodles for the rest of my time at school and my friends try to help me by offering money and there card to get me food, but i dont want to do that. I know its because im fat right, i dont care a girl got to eat…

Fouth thing. I plan to quit facebook it is making me very depressed, I hear about people dying, in the hospital, having parties, hanging out, missing me and other stuff. I care about everyone, but life is getting on my nerves and I hate to tell you off life but get your own life together, and stop trying to fix mine. I love life to death, but I cant keep this relationship going.

Fifth thing. I have a paper due and I have nothing written on it, my teacher said it sucked and she doesnt know how i passed english 101… that sucks because my english 101 teacher must have either been blind, being to nice,didnt read my paper, or she was lying so she didnt have to see my face…. smh

My life is a living hell. I know people are gonna be like compared to your life, man the people in africa had worst days. yeah i know i get it im not like the people in africa, im not starving, i dont have multiple viruses and im not dying. i get it but, cant i just complain about my life.. i didnt ask for you to read what i have to say, you choose to here about my life stories, to correct my grammer, fix my spelling and tell me off. But everyone has the right to there own opinion and I choose not to listen to you…

Thanks for reading, and thanks for listening, but of course you didnt have too, but thanks again. Life is a b****, depends on the way you treat her. well i treat her like a queen and she still want to act mean….